Nonverbal messages are both universal and cultural. They are universal in some areas but in others, they are culturally difference. I have encounter several cultural differences between America and Vietnam. I was born in Vietnam, lived there for 5 years and then moved to America when I was around 5 or 6.
I grew up America and picked up some of the nonverbal communication that teenagers learn to have with one another. An example of what I always do with my friends is hug. Everywhere I go, I hug people I know. Hugging is a form of greeting that leaves a nice and friendly feeling behind. In high school, I hug all of my friends when I first see them and I carried it on into college. When I was a Freshmen in college, I took a trip to Vietnam. At this age, I was a very touchy person; this was my love language. I touch because I want to connect with them physically. I touch when I want to make a point and I want them to understand me, and I hug during greetings. I find that in Vietnam, most people/adults do not like to hug. I tried hugging my aunts and older cousins and was left feeling awkward. It was just weird. It seemed like they do not want to be touched. Maybe teenagers in America hug because they want to feel closer to their friends. But the older generations, like business men, only shake hands and rarely ever get closer than that. I wonder if because people are feeling reserved and unsure of themselves. I know that in Vietnam, people hug only when they are super close with each other, but never on a first meeting basis. Maybe it was because my cousins did not really know me to hug me so they did not use that kind of nonverbal communication. I guess for me, hug and touch is a constant nonverbal communication and others do not share the same ideas.
Signing out,
Events Dreamer
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I can completely relate because my mom’s side of the family is Chinese and physical affection isn’t really a common thing. My boyfriend comes from a very physically affectionate family—hugs, kisses, etc. even for people who aren’t part of their family. My family is starting to warm up to the idea of hugs because my sister and I both have significant others who hug them anyway! It was definitely very awkward the first time! However, the reverse is also true, when I first met my boyfriend’s family, they gave me hugs when it was time to leave—it was really strange! I wasn’t quite expecting it and didn’t really know how to react, so I just sort of stood there. It’s interesting to see the different amount of physical affection that is normal in each culture.
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